The Host Club of Improbably Placed Men
by Acacia Eastbramble
Summary: This is just a silly idea some friends and I came up with at lunch one day. It involves more than just FMA and Naruto characters. There are actually six men, each from a different anime. Enjoy and try not to take it too seriously.


This is just a really silly concept that a couple of friends and I came up with when we were bored at lunch one day. Enjoy.

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><p><strong>The Poster:<strong>

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><p>He didn't know when it had been posted; honestly he hadn't ever been to this part of town. Or this town at all for that matter. He back tracked as he passed by a sign that promised pay. Not that he couldn't just steal food, but it would be nice to be able to pay. Stealing made him feel guilty sometimes.<p>

And so he read off the information, mumbling quietly to himself.

"Hosts needed for startup club. No experience necessary. Fair pay. Commission work. Huh."

Hige grabbed one of the little slips off the bottom of the poster and trudged over to a nearby pay phone.

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><p>He swished his wine around in his glass as the hostesses giggled amongst themselves, apparently finding something amusing.<p>

"What's so amusing ladies?"

"Oh, nothing, Mr. Khushrenada ," one of them answered, a stunning redhead who had only been attending to him for a week or so, he couldn't remember her name.

"No, please, go ahead," he said with an indulgent smile.

"Well," she said as she looked over at the other girls nervously, "They're opening a host club down the street and…"

She trailed off, looking embarrassed.

Treize shot her another indulgent smile, letting her know that she wasn't offending him. _In fact_, he thought, _it would be interesting and I could get paid instead of paying_.

He leaned across the table toward them all as if about to tell them a secret and they all leaned forward too.

"I would make a good host, don't you think?" he asked, arching his eyebrow as they all dissolved into fits of giggles.

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><p>He walked down the street, stuffing the remainder of his donut into this mouth. He reached into his bag and frowned when he discovered there was nothing left. He was still hungry. He seemed to be hungry more and more these days. He reached into the pocket of his red coat and dug around until he came up with the remainder of his funds.<p>

Three dollars was all he had to his name. His stomach growled.

Vash needed a job and he needed it soon.

He stopped at a poster that was taped to a stoplight pole. He didn't really pay attention to it until he saw the word "pay."

The more he read, the easier it sounded. Get paid to flirt with lonely women. Hell, he did that for free.

So he took a slip off the bottom of the poster and searched around until he found a pay phone and dialed the number.

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><p>He walked down the street, hands shoved into the pockets of his long coat. He'd just come from Aya's shop a ways down the street and the man had been babbling incessantly about Yuki and then about how Haru needed to find a girl so that he could bring Aya business.<p>

Aya also told him about a business that was starting up that needed young men to work. It was commission pay and all he had to do was sit around, drink and talk to women who would pay him. It seemed really easy and he could always use some extra cash, especially because Akito was being extra strict with funds lately.

Aya had said that he had seen a flyer for it on a pole near the bus stop on the next street over. And finally Haru found it. He ripped one of the tabs off of the bottom and waited for the bus so that he could go home.

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><p>"Brother, we need more money," he whined as he followed his brother down the street. "Why'd you have to go and make the boss angry?"<p>

"He was an idiot, I couldn't help it," Edward muttered as he continued to stomp down the street.

"But now we won't have enough money to pay for rent," Alphonse said, trying to match his brother's longer strides (something he was not used to).

"So I'll get another job," Edward said as he stopped at the bus stop and leaned against a pole.

"Wait," Alphonse said, "Move, brother."

"What?" he asked as he pushed away from the pole.

Alphonse turned him around and jabbed his finger at the sign that had a couple tabs missing already.

"No," Edward said. "That's dumb. I'm not going to sit around and flirt with girls for money. That's ridiculous."

"Come on, Edward, we need money and I bet they'd let you in," Alphonse pleaded but then stopped and considered something, "You'd have to be a lot nicer though."

"I am nice."

"Nicer, brother, nicer," he said, "Please."

"Fine," he said as he ripped a tab off a little too forcefully.

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><p>He walked out of the hostess club intent on the flyer the girls had been talking about. It seemed like a good idea to him. He was attractive, charming, charismatic, talented and modest, so why shouldn't they want him. Girls would flock to him in this situation. It was the mask. It added to the mystery. Women love mystery.<p>

Kakashi grinned.

Plus, it'd be fun and he'd earn some extra cash. What could be better than that?

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><p><strong>Hope you enjoyed. This is just the beginning. Let me know if you can think of any silly things you'd like to happen in this oh so improbable host club.<strong>


End file.
